stage: 6

How to talk to a care home about end of life — the conversation to have before it's urgent

Ask to arrange a care planning meeting specifically to discuss end of life. Most care homes will initiate this conversation as a resident's condition advances, but families do not need to wait to be asked. Come prepared with any documents already in place — an advance care plan, a DNACPR, a Lasting Power of Attorney. The questions to cover include: what the person's known wishes are, how the home will manage pain and discomfort, whether there is a palliative care team the home works with, what the process will be when the person's condition deteriorates rapidly, who will be contacted and when, and what the home's approach is to having family present in the final hours. A good care home will welcome these conversations. If a home is reluctant to engage with end of life planning, that is itself a signal worth noting.